times like dis

i cant help but wonder what if i taken the other road..what will i be doin now if i have insisted on what i wanna do instead of follow what other has said..some people even told me that i shud have do something that i love to do & wanna do~i know it is too late to think about all this now & i shud think ahead..i seriously need a new life..suddenly i feel bored,bored of evything but there;s nothing i can do about it..that is what frustrated me the most that the fact that my life is dull & yet i cant do anything..it is alwaz lk dat..juz lk my lil shout-out space here..it is alwaz black & white with lil colour here & there..i know it is boring but i cant help but loving..there is only lil colour here & there..it is so well representing my life...

all im feeling now is boredom & unhappy bcoz im doin something that i never in my life like to do even though my life depended on it..im juz doin it for the sake of my parents happiness which = my happiness..whenever times like this come,i'll be pulling my hair, cramming my head & swearing for a better life..does all this worth evything in the end of the day?? i really wanna knw the answer..they dun understand it nor they ever will understand..all they know is simply utter the word "i know you can do it..just study well so that next time you will have a good life & wun get look down by other people"..it is easy to say,hard to do..who dun wan a good life but the matter is whether they are capable or not..im absolutely not doubting my own ability as i knew myself well but this is plain torture to me....& to think of the fact that i still have a few years to go juz make me go crazy....
i can only keep telling lies to myself that evything is gonna be alright...yes,continue telling myself that...

i need to sleep..not bcoz i din zzz but i really dun wan continue this..
all i can do is juz surrender to my life & go zzz
& start a new day tomorrow...
아자 아자 파이팅!!!!!!